My boyfriend’s mom’s house is a zoo. It’s not like there’s goats in the backyard or anything, just a couple of your regular house pets who happen to be completely mad and to create the impression of a houseful of crazy instead of two cats and a dog. The dog is half black lab half st.bernard, which is a mega mix. He ways more then double me i’d say and he has a barrel chest that rumbles the floor when he even starts to think about growling. He’s one, so more of a giant monster drooly puppy then a dog really. He head butted a kid in the park the other day. Because he was being a good boy and jumped head first with his feet tucked down so as not to land on his shoulders and crush his little-boy spine. God that could have been worse then it was. When the kid woke up his mom wasn’t even all that mad.
just kidding.
So there’s monster dog. Who El taught to walk between your legs as like a funny greeting when he was small; and who now is busy unlearning that particular trick after getting beat over the head by old ladies he picked up off the ground with his snout.
And then there’s the master of the house, adult cat, also black. Prowls around the house all low and slouchy like he thinks he’s a cougar. Sometimes gets jealous of the attention everyone else gets and think he might like to get pet, but then changes his mind after two strokes and whips out the claws.
And then there’s my favorite little dude ever. Kitten named Cole. Broke his arm on his second day home because he had climbed like a maniac to the top of the door frame and got scared shitless by El’s screaming mother running at him worried that he’d fall. So then he fell. And ran around with flourescent orange cast on for two weeks wacking everything on the table over with one swipe of his mighty plaster arm, and making a great whappity whappity sound when he runs.